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The following article was published in Your Health Magazine. Our mission is to empower people to live healthier.
Monica Marusceac, owner
To Love and Be Loved Our Deepest Human Need
NOVA Hypnosis and Wellness
. http://novahypnosisandwellness.com

To Love and Be Loved Our Deepest Human Need

Overwhelmingly, men and women, singles and couples, people claim to hate Valentine's Day. If that is the case, then why do Americans send more cards during Valentine's Day than any other holiday other than Christmas?

Because no matter how much we try to distract ourselves with work, school, hobbies, chores, sports, diets, exercise, etc., the bottom line is that our deepest human desire, our greatest human need, is to love and to be loved.

People try to deny this, claiming instead that their deepest desire is to give back to humanity, to make $1 million, or to have children, but if we dig beneath the surface of these myriad claims, each will take us back to the human need to be loved.

Think about it why does anyone do anything? Why do people work harder? Why do people study more? Why do people go to the gym? Or go on a diet? Or save money?

There may be several levels of rationalization between what we do and the need to be loved, but here is the simple explanation We do the things we do to prove to others that we are worthy of being loved.

Whether what we do is altruistic or not, or benefits others or only ourselves, every choice we make is in the hope that we are worthy enough to be loved. And by extension, every stressor in our lives boils down to the possibility that, in the end, we may not be enough for love.

Stress Is When Reality Does Not Mirror Beliefs

Consider what causes you stress. Whether it's work, school, family, or money, stress is the perception that things are not as they “should” be. The question is Who says they “should” be that way in the first place?

Many people respond to the question above by saying “I'm the one who says things 'should' be a certain way or not!” If that is the case, then why did you decide that things “should” be that way and not another way? Typically, the answer is “Because things being that way is important to my happiness.”

However, after continuing to dig deeper, people often reach the ultimate conclusion that his or her deepest source of happiness is the exchange of love with another human being. This is true for everybody, regardless of how many levels of justification (e.g. money, security, tradition, beauty, etc.) we had to pass through to get there.

Our “Should's” Are Our Programming

Those levels of justification come from the fact that, as children, we are programmed to believe we need to be a certain way to be loved. This subconscious programming is different for each of us but it's there nonetheless. Thus, when things are not as they “should” be in our lives, we think that our greatest fear is coming true we are not enough and we will never be truly loved.

This subconscious fear is the driving force towards many unhealthy activities excessive drinking, drug use, excessive working, over-eating, serial dating, over-spending, etc. that put love even further out of reach.

We can, however, break out of this mindset and stop the accompanying self-sabotaging behavior using techniques such as hypnotherapy and NLP. By changing our mindset, we can change our future.

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