How To Re-Think Your Life

By Mary Baker, LCPC

Sol Purpose Life & Empowerment Counseling & Coaching

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How To Re-Think Your Life

This is the time of year when many of us are feeling sad, drained or frustrated. We look around and we dont like what we see the economy, traffic, and tragic events in the news. We can even just look into our own corner of the universe and feel stuck. We feel as though we have tried all we can to make things better and feel pushed back. Maybe, then its time for a reframe.
Reframing is a technique that comes from neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) where an undesirable behavior or trait is given a positive spin. Reframing can also be used in (NLP) to describe changing the context of a problem reframing experiences in a more realistic or positive light. This can help us to develop more rational beliefs and healthy coping strategies.
Therefore, reframing is just altering the meaning of a situation or event. Since meaning can drive our thoughts and feelings, assigning a new meaning can help us feel differently.
Reframing is simply looking at a situation from a different angle to get a better perspective. Often, just by doing this we can see aspects we did not see before, and therefore some solutions. There are those that say that problems are actually gifts they show us what needs to be attended to in order to move forward, stretch and grow, and be the better for it. The less than optimal physical exam can be an opportunity to be “forced” into eating better and working out, with the result of feeling so much better every day! The argument with your sister can be upsetting or a trigger to finally sit down and think about what the relationship needs. Feeling angry about a situation can be seen as a depressive thing or a wonderful catalyst to get us moving toward a solution.
We can look at a crisis as an opportunity for many things we are forced to change, we learn something, we finally face something about ourselves, or we simply discover a strength we didnt realize we had. Fire often starts with friction and so does change. Motivation to move forward usually doesnt bubble up to the surface when we are content. Friction (frustration) is necessary to get us moving. We can then be grateful for “having” to experience this now, for without it we might not have learned, experienced, grown. Even if we dont realize it until much later, if we are honest with ourselves we will see it.
So, look at your frustration, your sadness, your anger and look for the gift you might be nicely surprised if you open it!